What's My Purpose?

A question we all ask ourselves at some point is "What's my purpose?". There are lots of reasons why we can wonder about our purpose. Often its brought on by natural transitions in life like college graduation, a career change, newly single, or having your first child. We want to be able to contribute in meaningful ways in the world no matter what season we find ourselves. On today's episode, Lele and Juli discuss the questions around purpose, why we all crave it, and how we can begin to work through the process of discovering our purpose. Let's settle in for a honest conversation about something we all hope for and need... finding and knowing our purpose. 

Transcript

juli-_1_04-14-2025_134536: 0:07

Hey y'all. Welcome back to my Tennessee table. I'm here with Lili for another episode and we were just laughing because last week when we hit the record button, we usually give ourselves a few seconds, you know, before we do any intro music. And we have a little space to, well space to add interim music. And it was so cute'cause Lily opened us last week and so on the recording, it's dead silent. Then Lili, you go. I'm so excited. I can't believe I did that. I was so excited. You were so excited. And I pulled you outta your comfort zone. You did. It felt good. Yeah. Like today I was like, I can do this. Yeah. I did it once. You can do it again. This again. I absolutely can. You were so cute. I debated whether I should leave it in'cause it was so fun. People would've been like, what? What did I just hear? Somebody whisper. I'm so excited. I'm so excited. Are excited. I know. I was gonna say, you know, I have to sing in every episode. I know. Well, I was thinking we could add that, you know, we can add the music, but that's not who we are. I guess we're not necessarily, what if that was our intro music? I'm so excited. There you go. Do you wanna record it? Record it. Okay. We'll see. And we'll stick it on there. We'll see. We'll see. Yeah. We are excited. And I wanted to start off today, y'all. We had some just really sweet. Feedback from listeners and, and I hate to say just even listeners'cause they're friends. and, just, it was so encouraging and kind and we pray before every podcast we said that, and we also pray individually about the podcast. Mm-hmm. And Lord, where do you want to go? who can it reach? What do you want to look like? Longevity, because that's always the thought, you know, want to, be thinking ahead and. We had got answers this week from people's feedback, which is so sweet. So Samantha, I met Samantha at Bible study on Wednesday. Oh yeah. I had told you about her. I didn't know her. Mm-hmm. And she was sharing about the episode on Sabbath. Mm. And her group leader. was like, well, Julie's here. She's at that table, and Samantha's like, what? And she goes, yes. She, she's here. She goes, tr and so does Lily. So I got to meet her and it was so wonderful and so, and she, I, it was just so good. She said, I've taken notes on all the spiritual discipline, episodes, I told her, I said, I want you to know you are an answer to my prayer today. I was praying that morning about podcast and, and I said, and you have a friend. You have a new friend, Uhhuh, we're friends. Mm-hmm. And she's recently moved here and she was delightful. So thank you Samantha. Thanks for just saying something. Yeah. Yeah. I like the people that say something, you know, sometimes we think about it. Yeah. I wanna be one of those kind of people. Yes. That just says like. When they, if you're just walking by a stranger and you see them and you think, oh God, like they look so pretty today. Yes. Saying You look beautiful today. Yes. I've, I've seen this recently, like I've, and I've wanted to say something and I've just been oh, you know, that's too shy. Or I'm not shy, but just, I was gonna say lately too inconvenienced. I don't know. Or. Like, oh, I don't want them to think I'm a weirdo by saying that. Right. So, yeah. Yeah. I like people that say something. Yeah. Thank you, Samantha. Yes. And you had a friend say, just send a little text. That was encouraging too. Yeah. My friend Sarah was like, I just listened to the podcast and it was so great. I love that y'all just jumped right into it. And I was like, you listened. And she was like, yeah, this is my truth teller friend. So I know if she says something that, that it means something. You know? I knew that when you had sent along to me and I was like, yes, Sarah. Okay. She is the truth and we love that. Yes. I had a really, well, she is a really good friend of mine, and she lives in Wyoming. Mm-hmm. And she's a therapist and she's wonderful. Ginger. And she sent a little text and I had sent along to you too. Mm-hmm. Just this very encouraging and it was the same day. Samantha. Oh. I'm like, Lord, you're so good to us. Mm-hmm. So thank you all so much for just being on this journey with us. Ginger had even said, I felt like I was at the table with y'all, and wouldn't we wish to have everybody at the table? Come on, y'all. Come on with us. It's just been such a blessing. So thank you for the feedback you all and really all glory to Lord. That's not. That's not tooting our horn or anything. We're just so thankful for the encouragement and yeah, God's been so good to us in that, so thank you. So I wanted to start off with that, let people know. We really appreciate that. And then let me tell you this, which is nothing on topic at all. Okay. What? I went to the eye doctor today. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. it was great. Eyes are good, it's fine. Mm-hmm. But she tried some new like contacts for me mm-hmm. To help me.'cause I'm kind of in the, put your readers on stage of life. And so I thought, is there anything you can do to help me? And so she kind of fussed with them a little bit, which was fine. And then I got in the car and I looked in the mirror and I was like, oh my gosh. Is that what I look like?'cause I could see myself up close. I thought, oh no. So I had a conversation with the Lord. Yeah. I was like, Lord, why does this happen? Why do our eyes have to go? I know there's so many other things. I feel like that Uhhuh, I'm not a man, but I really feel like we women got a lot of things that happen as we mm-hmm. Younger and older and as we age. Mm-hmm. And anyways, then I realized. His graciousness. You don't know what you look like anymore. Mm-hmm. So as you get older, you're like, I look good. Yeah. I look great. Because you can't see yourself. I look so good. You can't see yourself when you put your makeup on, except for I, I'm having the same issues. I had perfect vision until I hit, I think it was. 38, 39, 40, something like that. And my eye doctor was like, yep, yep. That's when it happens. Yes. You people with perfect vision, it just goes south. And anyway, so when I put my makeup on, I have one of those like magnifying, uh, mirrors. Then that's how I put it on. And so I can see every little pore. So I think I see two, I think I see my skin too. Well, yes. To the point where I'm like, oh, ooh, wow. Yikes. Yeah, like we need some help. Here, skincare, please. I don't, I don't know. I thought that today, I thought, what? I gotta change some things up here. Anybody got a good skincare regimen? Let me know. Because now that I can actually see my face as I can, I have one of those mirrors too. Yeah. Do you use it? And it really, I use it every day. Yeah. And it's really not your best friend. I mean, you want it to think it is. Well, you know, I don't wanna leave the house and then be like, oh golly, why didn't anybody tell me? Well, that's true. I don't wanna have that. This was. Outta whack on my face or when I was putting my makeup on, I put, I know it in the wrong spot, or I don't know. You know, my eyebrows are thinning and now it's just like, what? They're on my chin. So what's going on with that? Like, why is my hair from my eyebrow on my chin? And you want that on before you leave the house? That that's exactly why I have that mirror for. And the tweezers and the Yes. Yes. Oh, Julie, we're aging ourselves here. What are we doing? Don't worry, it's gonna happen to everyone. It is. That's what I tell myself. So anyhow, there you go. We did say we wanted to do a, episode on how to age well. Yes. I better get my brain around that. No, we were talking about our hearts and so obviously my heart is gonna need to, it's gonna grow and being humble and. And letting some vanity go. Yeah. You know? Oh yeah. And, and love myself. And so anyways, thank you eye doctor. Thank you eye doctor. You can see better, but I don't know if I'm not be about it. I dunno. I dunno if I like it. Oh, I totally get it. I did, I tried contacts recently. My eye doctor was like, well, yeah, if you wanna try contacts, let's try it. And I, I put'em in and had'em in for a day and thought it was great. And then I didn't put them back in again. You don't have to. You don't have to. It just felt like a lot of work. Yeah. I don't know. Do they hurt your eyes? No. I just, this is just easier. Mm. Yeah. To put my glasses on. Glasses on. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I get it. Well, you're cute in your glasses. Oh, you're sweet. Thank you. Well, this is Holy Week. Oh, it is? Holy week. It is Holy week. It's Palm Sunday. on Sunday. Yeah. This is one of my favorite weeks. Just for, Just spending time and reflection. Mm-hmm. And just such gratitude and gratefulness for the Lord's salvation and gift as we remember his, just road to the cross. Mm-hmm. So lots of things happened this week. Palm Sunday. Mm-hmm. Which we had a great service at church. We have Monday, Thursday coming up, that is just represents the last supper. Mm-hmm. In Jesus washing the disciples feet. Mm. good Friday and then Easter. So lots happening. Have you done a Monday, Thursday service? No. Before, like foot washing service? No. Okay. I mean, I've done a foot washing service probably back when I was doing student ministry. Okay. Like at camp? Mm-hmm. We would have like a foot washing service. Yes. Like maybe the Thursday night of camp, which was probably like cry night. And do y'all remember those days at youth camp? But I don't know that I've ever gone to a Monday Thursday. Okay. Service. Okay. Well I didn't, I don't even think I knew that there was. Such a thing. A thing? Yeah. Okay. Well, in, at our church in Wyoming. Okay. We did them uhhuh and we did foot washing. Oh wow. Wow. Also, so we'd be together for the service Uhhuh, and then women would go with women, women with men, and we did foot washing service. And so you'd get ins who wash the feet. You just get in, we'd have circles of chairs. Okay. In a room. Yeah. Fellas would go one way. Mm-hmm. Women would go the other way and whomever you happen to sit with your eight people in your circle. Mm-hmm. They would have everything you need for your foot washing service. And then you don't know whose feet you're gonna wash it. Just whoever happens to be next to you. What you do, they play soft music and a woman would give just a little scripture reading. Okay. And it was very silent. Wow. And that was purposeful. Yeah. They would ask us to, you know, let's not talk. Mm-hmm. Let's just serve. Mm-hmm. And we'd have tissue, tissue on the table, table, smart tissue on the table. And it was beautiful. lots of weeping and tears from the person who's washing the feet. Wow. There's just something really powerful in that service that, It's representative what Christ did for his disciples at that last supper. With it all mixed together of his humbleness and how we humble ourselves before someone else. And the love you feel for that woman that you've never met before. It's beautiful. Is beautiful. How big was your church there? Wyoming? Don't, we was probably 1800 or That's a big church to be doing. Yeah. Yeah, we broke it up. That's awesome. I mean, like, again, in groups, you know, and not everyone came'cause it was not, it was a midweek service. Yeah. So there's things going on in, this holy week or Easter week, but it was really meaningful and we've done it with our kids before. Mm-hmm. Just gather our kids up and done it to each other. Mm-hmm. Wash feet, which is really beautiful. Yeah. To do. Anyways, I just encourage people, if you haven't done it before, it's a wonderful experience. Yeah. To do. I love that. You know, there, the, the Holy Week is just such a heavy week. I would think that, you know, having that service, like you said, there were so much weeping that that just seems, oh. Right. You know? Yes. Oh, sure. Yeah. And I appreciated, I'm a talker because we didn't know that, but I appreciated that they wanted the, the mood to be quiet and reflective. Mm-hmm. And like I said, beautiful music playing. they wanted you to all in it. Mm-hmm. You know, experience it, it was beautiful. So what about like a Seder meal? Have you done a Seder meal for I have wanted to do a Seder meal and I have not. And I've had friends that have done Seder meals and I've always thought, oh, that seems so great. And I just haven't, yes. Gotten myself organized enough to like, make it happen. Have you, have you done a Seder meal? Well, we did it with, I did it one time with one of my, small groups, women, small groups, Uhhuh and some of the ladies came early to help me.'cause there's like parts to it. Yeah. You know, there's, yeah. That's why I haven't done it. Yes. But our community group lead gave all the leaders a packet and it was a packet friend of the Seder meal. So how you set the table, the readings that happened, the blessings, the food, the story of the exodus, all of it, and it was amazing. Okay, so I'm gonna see if I can find my notes. So if. For listeners who don't know what a Seder meal is? Oh, yes. Will you explain that? Yes. Okay. That's representative of the last Supper. Yeah. And so Jesus had that meal. It's Passover. Mm-hmm. Passover meal, last supper. Mm-hmm. Same thing. Seder meal. All the same. and it's representative of when God delivered the Israelites from Egypt. Mm-hmm. And so the food is symbolic of that exodus. Mm-hmm. The blessings are, and it's a remembrance. And then there's a Seder plate in the middle of the table. with all the food items on it. And then you also get to participate in that, meal together. And I, spread the readings out so ladies got their reading mm-hmm. When they got there at their place. So they would know when they read, you can do the full meal, which is a little longer, or I think there's a way to kind of shorten that or amend it, but it was just, it was really, you do the readings, they come from like the Old Testament, right? Mm-hmm. And some others. Yeah. Okay. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And it was just really, it was really cool to think. This is a remembrance and it's a grateful moment. And it was, it was just really memorable. So I'm trying to get myself together to do one this year. I gotta go find my notes. Yeah. I haven't done it. You know, there's some things I think that are traditions. Mm-hmm. And they can kind of get lost on you because they are such traditions. Right. And you do'em every year and dah, dah, dah. Right. But I think that there's like just so much beauty in something that has happened. Like for so long centuries. Yeah. Yes. Mm-hmm. And to be doing that, something that Jesus did and he participated in, I just think that's really beautiful. Just as a Christ follower to get to participate in that Yes. As well. And like, reflect on that and be like, this has been done for centuries and there's a reason and a purpose behind it. Yes. Mm-hmm. It's not just like, I think one of the episodes I think I talked about, that I know some Jewish families and getting to participate in the naming ceremony will, this is kind of like stirring my thoughts on those kind of things too. Mm-hmm. Like just these traditions and ceremonies that have happened. For so long, but there's just so much beauty in them. Mm-hmm. Like, I don't wanna, I don't wanna let them go. No. You know? No. Like keep, keep doing them. Well, and they're all purposeful. Yeah. You know, any of those festivals or celebrations Right. That the Lord, instructed his people to do. Right. There's a meaning. Yes. Not just doing it to, you know, do it. Yes. and this one's very meaningful. So if I get myself together, okay.'cause I thought about asking your family over so. Maybe, yeah, maybe Thursday. I don't know. We'll see what your Thursday. We could do it another day. Okay. Especially it's like Monday, Thursday. Right. But, anyways, I almost grabbed my notes for this episode upstairs, but we're talking about other stuff too, so. Okay. Yeah, yeah. I didn't get'em, but yeah, it's really, it's pretty powerful. I really. I really enjoyed it. Hmm. It was that group holy week. Yeah. I love it. So we hope that y'all will, just kind of dive into that opportunity this week to reflect and to be grateful. I was on the, I've already been on to find, you know, like a reading plan on YouTube. Lots of options for Holy Week for a reading plan, if you need something like that to just guide you through, you know, Christ's walk to the cross, so, oh yeah. Just encourage people to do that. So I need to do that. You saying that makes me be like, I've gotta go do that. Well, last night at church, yesterday I thought about, and then I thought, don't forget when you get home, get you a plan. Or just make one. Mm-hmm. You know, go to one of the gospels and make one. Yeah. You know, break up yourself reading and do it. Yeah. Mm-hmm. if you want more guided for that, there's Sure opportunities mm-hmm. To do that. So anyways, I would suggest doing that. Maybe those are good thoughts, Julie. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. What are we talking about today? Well, I feel like we kind of talked about just purpose. Yes. And kind of what our purpose is. I know I've been thinking about this a lot lately. I have a birthday coming up and you know when you Oh, you too. Yeah. May 4th. May 4th. Star Wars fourth be you. That was not always a thing, guys, let's just be real. That kind of drives me crazy'cause, but everybody remembers my birthday. They're like, oh, that's how I remember. You're the Star Wars kid. You were. And I'm like. Well, no, that wasn't the case. Yes, but it is May the fourth. Yes. May the fourth, which I think is a really cute birthday. May the fourth. It's spring birthday. It's beautiful. Yeah. It's a good time to have a birthday to be born. Mm-hmm. Thank you, Jesus. For another year. Yes. But you know, as you approach another year, especially at my age, I'm like in that midlife mm-hmm. Where I'm like, am I having a midlife crisis?'cause I just keep thinking about purpose and what I'm doing and these kind of things. Mm-hmm. Like. Is this a midlife crisis? Is that why I am thinking about all of these things, but I'm not having a crisis. Like, I'm not like, you know, running off the deep end or anything. Right, right. But I am really thinking about it a lot. Mm-hmm. And I was, um, I was in the car and I was thinking about this morning actually, and I was like thinking about how when I was in my twenties and. Yeah, probably just majority of my twenties. You know, you're thinking about God. What's your plan for my life? If you're a Christ follower, right? You're thinking about God, what is your plan for my life? And it feels like this big, weighty. Question that you're just like, what am I supposed to be doing? Right? Because, and I, I was thinking it's because you're in this season of picking a career. Maybe you're in college, or maybe you're in cosmetology school, maybe you're, you know, in trade school or something, but you're trying to figure out where you're going, like the direction, how you're going to provide for yourself. You're leaving your parents' nest. Mm-hmm. And you're turning into, you know, yourself and you're creating this life for yourself. And so where do you wanna go? What do you wanna do? The, the world is yours. You could literally go anywhere. And so I think, uh, in your twenties you're just constantly just seeking out, God, what am I supposed to be doing with my life? What is your will for my life? And it's just this big dangly question. Well then I felt like in my thirties I was like. Not even thinking about that. You're just keeping yourself and children alive. Yes. Yes. Yeah, it, I mean, I was basically just surviving, which sounds so dramatic. No, and like bad. It wasn't bad. It just, your kids, when you have little kids, they're all consuming, and so you don't have the mental capacity to think about like, what could I be doing with my life? You're like, I'm just doing it, doing it. Like I'm just waking up in the moment, like in the morning from the moment my feet hit the ground, I'm going for it until you hit. Your head hits the pillow at the end of the day, right? Yes. Like, you're just like, I'm done. Okay. Tired doing it again tomorrow and hope nobody wakes up in the middle of the night. You know? Mm-hmm. So tho, tho, that's kind of those years and then here I am, I've like now launched all my kids off into school and it, and I, and I work like I have a, I have a job. I'm a photographer. And the beauty of that, at least for the last. 15 years has been that I get to plan my own schedule and I get to do what I wanna do and say yes to the projects I wanna say yes to and that kind of stuff. It's great. But now. It's changed. Like my kids are in school all day and I mean, I could literally go get a nine to five if I wanted to. And Eric, and I've talked to Eric about that. My husband, I'm like, Eric, what if like, if I were to go just get a nine to five, what could you see me doing? And the things that he tells me are not nine to fives. Like I'm like, no, if I did that, I would be on call all the time, or I'd be working weekends or I'd be doing blah, blah. And he's like, yeah. Yeah, I don't know. Well thank you for your help. I appreciate that. But anyway, back to the subject of purpose is you just kind of hit this point, I think, where you're like, I could literally do anything. What am I supposed to be doing? And you go back to that question of, God, what? What's your will for my life? What should I be doing? And the thing I feel like I keep hearing the Lord just gently speak to my heart, is. Don't make it so complicated, Lily. Mm. Like, just do what you're supposed to do every day. Get up. Love me, serve me faithfully. Follow me. And it'll all fall into place. You know, if, if, and if, if I'm stirring something in you that's me, follow it. Do it. Very good. You know, like, don't, don't make it so complicated. I've been having these conversations with my next door neighbor who's very deep and I love talking to her'cause she just helps me think outside of the box on things. And I was talking about. I was talking about my daughter Emmy. Mm-hmm. And how full of joy she is, and she just never meets a stranger. And I told her, I said, I just feel like that's who I am if nothing bad had ever happened to me in my life. Mm-hmm. Like if I had never experienced any trauma or. You know, nothing had ever gone sideways. I just think I would be a lot like Emmy because I am essentially a lot like her. But then I have things in my life that just stop me from being able to just fully be who I am. And so my neighbor was like, well, what if you did this? And she's just brilliant. She's like, sit down and just do a creative writing. sit down and think about like what would your, what would a day look like if, if you were. That, that that's how you were living. And I thought, oh, that's so beautiful. So this week my homework is to write that all down and then I'm gonna go sit down with her because she said, here's the thing, you're gonna do this and it's gonna be great. And you're gonna think, oh man, this was so great. I feel so good. But. You need accountability. And I'm like, yes, accountability is where helps that whole purpose come into play, right? Is that you need somebody there to say, okay, this is, this is where you wanna go. Mm-hmm. This is who you wanna be and how you wanna live. let me help you get there. Mm-hmm. So I think purpose is wonderful, but I think accountability also helps. You be able to find your purpose and also be able to pursue your purpose. Mm-hmm. Anyway, you've been thinking of a lot about purpose. What? That is so good. I just, and I know this neighbor. Thank you, neighbor. I'm so glad. She's my neighbor too. You should talk to report. Yeah. Go down. Then next she's down at the end close. Julie's at the front. I think that's wonderful. Well, like last week. Yeah. Vulnerability came up last week. Yeah. Separately for each one of us. We didn't realize that until we sat down and started sharing on the podcast in it. So this week was purpose for me too. So I'm like, boy, oh boy, Lord, thank you that'cause this speaks to me, that exercise or practice that our neighbor shared. Do it. That's a great idea. Mm-hmm. And for anybody else, I mean, I haven't even heard the idea, so that is, I'll send you the writing prompt. I was like, I need a prompt. Text me the writing prompt. Yeah. Yeah. So she texted me something I'll, I'll, I'll share it with you guys. Yeah. I'll put, I'll put it in show notes if you give it to me. Mm-hmm. That'd be great. and just to think about the accountability part, I didn't think of that either. I had written questions down just for myself, like why, why now? Like why is purpose coming up now? I haven't been employed for about three years. Mm-hmm. And so you'd think, I mean, I'm not that slow. You think I begin around you, what am I doing with my life? What am I do with my life? but really haven't thought about it consistently. And then just recently, maybe in the last two weeks or so. Purpose and I thought transitions, like you said, you know, you're going to college or you're starting a new job, or you've recently become single, or you're recently married, or now you're a mom. Mm-hmm. Or there's just transitions in life where we, um, wonder maybe what our purpose is and a Christian as a Christ follower under the umbrella. The biblical umbrella. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Our purpose is to love God and love people. Mm-hmm. Greatest two commandments. Yes. Right, right. Hands down and to glorify him. Yeah. And then within that, what's our avenue to do that? Yes. Because. And I was kind of shaming myself a little bit. Like, Julie, you know your purpose, you love God and love people. Yeah. That's what God asked you to do. I'm like, okay. But I'm still feeling like, what am I supposed to be doing? Yeah. Well, it's because we each have talents and capabilities mm-hmm. And spiritual gifts and experiences in life that guide us kind of in an avenue of how we do that. Mm-hmm. In a season. And that's another thing like. Purpose changes, I guess. I mean, I felt like I was purposeful and now I'm like, well, what's happening? Mm-hmm. But seasons change. Mm-hmm. And so purpose changes, or maybe we get new ones added onto the ones that we currently have. I. A purpose in. Yeah. And thinking about, well, what is purpose? I used that word and so I really had to sit and like look at the blue sky and think, good for you. Cheer Lee. I know, I thought LE's would be so proud of me and just think about, well, what, how would I define that? If someone had no idea what purpose was, what would I be saying? That's good. Yeah. What's a purpose? Mm-hmm. And for me, maybe it's defined individually, but just to contribute, like where am I contributing in meaningful ways? Oh yeah, I like that. Yeah. That's good. Or impactful ways. Yeah. Yeah. And maybe a legacy, maybe a not, I, I didn't really, I tried to write that word down as like, eh, I don't know that that's it, but it's just contributing mm-hmm. In meaningful ways and things that you, that feel valuable, you know, to other. Your life and other people's Yeah. Lives and those seasons shift. I ask the question to myself, when, when in life have I not wondered about my purpose? Oh, that's a, because I thought, well, maybe that'll help me. Kind of pinpoint what's going on. Mm-hmm. And recently we had gone to Wyoming for Christmas time and was with the kids and grandkids. And one night we went to bed and I told Lance, I said, and we've been there maybe 5, 6, 7 days. I said, I've never once worried about my purpose. Well, I've been here. Well, it's because I stepped back into that purpose. Mm-hmm. I was being mom and I was being grandma and I. Love the nurturing, caring, almost, almost to the extent my kids are like, we got it. Like we're good. We're alone. Mom. I know my son even said one time, he's so sweet. And I said something about, well, it's kind of cold out. Do you wanna take a jacket? And he is like, mom. I know. He goes, if I was cold, I would grab my jacket and I go, okay, Julie, you're the sweetest mom.'cause I just wanna scoop all those little chicks up and take care of everybody. Yeah. And so anyways, the point is that was when I didn't wonder about my purpose. Oh, for sure. Yeah. But in my season of life, that's not my purpose. And they don't need their mom to make them brush their teeth and take a coat to work. Not, I mean, and I don't live near them. Yeah. So what. What is it? What is my purpose in, um, contributing in meaningful ways and impactful ways? And it's not always a wonderment, but sometimes I think that practice from our neighbor is great. Mm-hmm. I know. I thought it was really great. I mean, I need to sit down and do it. Yeah. I need to follow through. That's where the accountability comes into play. Yeah. Yeah. Because she texted me last week and was like, Hey, you ready to talk about it? Did she? And I was like, Nope. I. I, I had a lot of work. We, I had a lot of work last week and I had just really didn't have time to like, wrap my brain around it, but I was like, let me take a rain check and we'll meet at the bus stop this week and talk about it because it is, it's, it's the, for me at least, I need accountability. Like I'm great at coming up with ideas and getting excited about a plan, and this is goal setting and those kind of things. Mm-hmm. I love it. I'm like, yes, let's do it all I love. but when it comes to like the follow through. And, and being in like the details of it, I'm not great at that. Right. And so having accountability makes you have to be like, follow through on things. Right? Right. You have to because they're gonna be checking in on you. Right. You know, just like if you work out and you hire a uh, trainer, well, it's likely that you're gonna show up. Mm-hmm. And you're gonna see results. Mm-hmm. Because you. Or working with a trainer, right. Who is going to hold you accountable. Right, right, right. So the same goes with having accountability. And she was even saying, we were talking about like, yeah, like a life coach, da da da. And she was like, but what if, what if the Christian community. What was that like? What if we were that to each other so you didn't have to go find, hire? Right. Pay for a life coach. Mm-hmm. What if you had me? Mm-hmm. Or someone else be accountability for you to really follow through on these things. I was like, yes. I was just thinking when you told her example, I was like, she's like a life coach. That's exactly what I thought. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like questions they would ask you because one of my questions was. I had a lot of questions, not a lot of answers, so this is so good. Mm-hmm. For me, I wrote down how do I measure if I'm doing it, But if we add an accountability piece to it, because it's not just thought. Yeah, it, there's action attached to it. Yeah. And then someone. That you allow in? Yeah. Can check in on you and Yeah. See how that's going. Well, that is measurable. Yeah. It's whether you've done it To what extent, how often is it working? Is it not? Yeah. Those are measurement tools. Yeah. Which would be really helpful. Yeah. So something I've been thinking about too, along these lines is, just our brains and how we're wired and those kind of things, and how like, you know, traumatic things in your life can help, can stop you mm-hmm. From being able to fully like be who you. Mm-hmm. Oh my goodness. Don't they? Maybe God created you to be, you know, and how healing can help you get through that and get to the other side and all these things. But anyway, I thought, what are just some like really like tangible steps that I can do to help just from the time I wake up? Maybe just get my morning started off. Better, at least like the first hour of the day. Mm-hmm. Like, let's, let's see what we can control there. And so, I mean, we talk about this a lot, but putting your phone in a different room. I plug my phone in the bathroom at night and so I don't see it until later in the morning. I mean, not like really late, but you know, I give myself about an hour. So having that in a different room, when I wake up in the morning, I'm not thinking about my to-do list. I'm not thinking about checking to see if someone's texted me, emailed me. There's like a delay on it, honestly. Like, I'm like, oh, about eight o'clock. I'm like, oh yeah. Mm-hmm. I should see like if somebody texted or if my husband made it to work or Right. Those kind of things. But so having it in a different room is helpful and it. It helps my mind say, okay, when I wake up in the morning, what do I want to think about first? And so for me, I've thought gratitude, like, what am I thankful for this morning? And so thinking about the things that I'm grateful for first thing in the morning has been really good for me. Good. It's almost like the next step, like I've been putting my phone in a different room. That's been really good. Mm-hmm. Well, now the next step is when the alarm goes off, don't hit snooze. And think about things that I'm grateful for. At least five, six things. Mm-hmm. And for me as a Christ follower, when I'm being grateful for things, I'm praying, I'm saying thanks to God, right. For those gifts. And a lot of times it's things that I know might even bog me down during the day, like. If I, let's give an example. Like, thank you God, that my son loves to play soccer. I love watching him play soccer. And if I wake up and I think that first thing in the morning, then when it's time to get ready for soccer and we're trying to pack up all this stuff and we're driving an hour to the soccer tournament, we're spending the whole entire day there, which can be. Fun and also a little exhausting Sure. Or whatever, but mentally I've already been like, I'm so thankful that my son like loves to play soccer and I get to go watch him. Like what a joy. Like this is what I always wanted when I thought, when I was in my twenties, I'll tell you this, when I was in my twenties, I. If I had said, Lely, what do you wanna be when you grow up? What do you wanna do? Uh, really the number one thing that would've come to my mind is I would want to be a mom. Mm-hmm. So sometimes I look back and I think about Lely at 2021, and what would she think about my life today? Mm-hmm. Like, what, how would she view it? Would she be like, wow, you've really made a mess of things here, sister. Oh, you know, or, mm. Wow. What? What happened there? Why aren't you doing this? Why aren't you doing that? I think she would walk into my house and be like, this is amazing. Awesome. You have three kids, like you have this wonderful husband and he has this job and he helps take care of you guys and provide for you, and you get to do this fun, creative job and you get to be with people and take pictures and preserve memories for them. Like I think she would just be so delighted. Mm-hmm. In what I'm doing. And so sometimes when I think about purpose and what is my purpose, I think, well, what would 20 something lely think? Right? About what my life is like today. Mm-hmm. And so I think she would be, I think she would be thrilled. I think she'd be very happy. Yes. Very happy. Yes. Hope she would be disappointed in me. No, I have heard, and I can't remember where I heard it, of writing a letter to yourself. As though you are 80 or 84, 85 and write it to yourself now. Mm-hmm. Um, maybe it's about things that are really, concerning or stressful now, and don't worry about. This because it's gonna be okay. Yeah. Or, purpose. It'll be marvelous when you get to this end, how God weaves it together. Yeah. It's almost like a hope filled letter. Yeah. Of what it could be. It's not like manifesting none of that business is going on. Yeah. But just, affirmation and confirmation of, God's goodness and that he has things taken care of and that life will be mm-hmm. More than you ever. Could have imagined. Mm-hmm. You know, it talks about Ephesians three 20 that he can do infinitely more than we'd ever imagined. Yeah. And so I have heard of that practice before. I, I wanna back up because when, remember when I told the story about, when you said, I'm so excited Yeah. At the beginning, and I, I didn't keep it. I should have, the interesting part was I thought that sounds just like Emmy. Oh. And then you brought it up that you would be Emmy. And I see a lot of you in Emmy. Or Emmy and you, Yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot of her and you. Anyhow. that's interesting because I do see it that way. And you have an example. She's in front of your little eyeballs every day, so you can, she just, she lives uninhibited. Mm-hmm. And I think that's the biggest. Thing that I see in her. And I think if we all lived uninhibited, like when we saw like, like we were talking about at the beginning of the podcast, when we see something saying something. Mm-hmm. Like that's living uninhibited. Right. And being like, Julie, your hair looks awesome today. Instead of just like thinking that in my mind and not saying anything. I, I just said it. I didn't care if you thought that was weird that I said that. Like, I'm just living uninhibited. She just dances everywhere. She just lives this like ladi da life. Mm-hmm. And I just think, gosh. Mm-hmm. What a nice way to live. Mm-hmm. But then, you know, you think about Jesus and how he lived his life and in a lot of ways. I do think Jesus lived. Y'all, please don't like come at me with this, but I do think he lived a lottie da kind of life. He wasn't worried about anything, right? He wasn't caught. Up in like what you said about, like when you're 85 writing a letter to yourself today and not being worried about things. Like he wasn't, he just wasn't worried. Mm-hmm. He, he knew how it was all gonna work out. Mm-hmm. He knew how the father would take care of everything. I think we've said this before, he was a non-anxious presence. Like there he was fun. I think, I think Jesus was probably very childlike. Mm-hmm. In a way. Mm-hmm. and just how he lived. Mm-hmm. And I, I do think that maybe there, there was an. Uninhibited part of him. Mm-hmm. Because he just. Was there to be, what was there to hold back? He was perfect, right? Mm-hmm. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah, ju, our theological scholar, no. Well, this is not gonna sound cut that out theological at all. No, I'm not. But we were watching March Madness and Florida was playing Houston. Sorry, Lily Auburn got beat out there. Yeah, I wasn't into that game, so sorry. I know. So we were watching that and towards the end of the game. I was fiddling in the kitchen and I was up and down, Lance. It's like, why are you not watching? Because I like that, you know, I like sports. And so I go, I'm just nervous. I'm concerned how it's gonna end. And it just struck me. It just struck me when he said, Julie, I. The endings already determined. God knows what's gonna happen. Wow. Just sit down and enjoy it. And I thought, oh my gosh, that is applicable to so much. That's a great sermon example, Julie. I know if you ever have tried a sermon, keep that. I was like, oh my goodness. That's right. So I sat down and I watched the game finish and Florida won. And that was, I know, sorry. Terrible. It's, it's okay. Keep going. Your story's great. And so anyways, I thought, yeah, that's true. Mm-hmm. he, the end is determined. Let's just take the journey with Jesus and yes, we wanna know our purpose. I mean, I understand that. I do think sometimes too, and maybe we don't have time to get into it, but sometimes I think the enemy can, derail us or cause us distress or think about it more. Mm-hmm. Maybe we are in it. Mm-hmm. Or like you said, when God said, just do what I bring. That's your purpose today. Mm-hmm. Rather than getting tied up in a knot about it. Then otherwise just let our eyes be open to what. He's doing. Mm-hmm. And do that. Mm-hmm. Rather than fret or. Stress or even be sad Yeah. About feeling like purposeless. And I'm not, I'm not betting that emotion. Some people it's, it's very overwhelming and there's reasons for that. So, yeah. I'm saying in a general sense. So just to trust him. Yeah. And it's okay to, to dream big and be like, I have this big business plan and it's, I'm gonna bring this into fruition because. This is, but, and, and that might be your purpose. Like if God has put that in you, you're gonna have that drive to make that happen. Right. You know? Mm-hmm. So sometimes I think we get really hung up on, I don't know, I, I, I don't feel like driven to do this big thing right now. Right? It's like, well, that's okay. Like that might not be your purpose today. Like maybe five years from now, God might call you to start a church or move to a different country and be a missionary. But if you are not feeling. That call today, then you're supposed to be doing something else. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Like do what he's being, what he's calling you to today, and that might be just getting dinner on the table, right? Or. Meeting a friend and being fully present mm-hmm. In that conversation with them. Mm-hmm. While you're having dinner together like that, that's your purpose today. And we just do the next step. We know. Yeah. I'm thinking about David, that he got his call, that he was gonna be king and it took a long time gosh, for that to happen. Oh gosh. Yeah. Because God was growing him and raising him up and teaching him and he had life experiences. So sometimes we do have that stirring onto something. Mm-hmm. Just do the next step. Mm-hmm. You may not even have a clearer picture of whatever that is. Just take the next one. Mm-hmm. And God knows mm-hmm. The timing. All of it. Okay. Here's another sports analogy. Okay. Wow. I know. Goodness. Well, the masters was on, on there. Any sports analogy? Well, this, you can tell what we watch in our house, she's a sport is sports. And if you know me, I'm so uncoordinated. It's unbelievable. This is why I watch it. We can play golf. Barely. Anyways, we are watching the masters and Rory McElroy won for the first time. Spoiler alert. Spoiler alert. You don't know that in case you hadn't seen it. Yeah, now you know, but it's been 14 years of trying. Yeah, and getting close and not making it one significant time. But this year he grand slammed, which is only six people in history have ever done it. Mm-hmm. And I told Lance afterwards, I was like, oh my goodness. If he could have known if God would've been like, hold on. There's something bigger. Hold on. I know it's disappointing that you didn't win the Masters this year, but there's something coming. Just be determined, persevere, you know? Oh, if you could get the postcard of what's gonna happen. I know. You know, I know it's a little easier to trust sometimes, but just do the next thing that he is prompting your heart to do. I know. Enjoy the ride. Right? Enjoy the ride. Yeah. I don't think I enjoy it enough. Oh, I don't. I get to hung out. But you're going to, because you're gonna make your, you're gonna write out your creative writing, who you are, your creative writing. Let's see, let's see. I'm gonna see you dancing down there. Oh, Julie. And singing. I have dance parties all the time. So this, okay, this is totally off subject. This is just me like having just a mom brag moment for a second. Okay, go. You guys listen to this go so cave the other day. It was just me and him in the car. Cade, my 12-year-old son. Hear that. 12-year-old son, right? Preteen. Not the fun age. Okay. So we're in the car and we're driving and he could be, you know, just kind of moody and snide or whatever, but exactly what he's supposed to be doing right now. Great. You know, he's 12 years old. Sure. And he's a boy. And he says to me, mom, you're a fun mom. What he did? He said, you're a fun mom. Oh. And I said, I'm, I'm a fun mom. And I was like. Why, what makes me a fun mom? And he says, Hmm, because you like say awkward things and you don't care. So here's the thing I wish I just stopped with. You're a fun mom because I just would've like lived the rest of the day like LA because when I asked that, I thought he was gonna say, oh, because you always start the dance parties at the family gathering. Or when we have people over, you always turn on the music and start dancing or something like that.'cause I do that. Yes. Apparently that's not what he thinks is fun about me. It's that I say awkward things and I don't care. It's like, okay. Okay. Kate, thank, thank you. I dunno, but the bottom line is you're fun, I guess. Yeah. I mean, I am fun. I know that. I mean, I can be fun. I know that. I know that about myself. You are fun. In my friend group, I know I have, I, I told them on our recent girls trip, I was like, y'all, I feel like I'm not. Holding up to my end of the bargain'cause I wasn't being fun enough. Oh. And they were like, Le don't feel like you always have to be fun. And I was like, oh, but I do. You guys always looked at me and you're like, okay, when are you gonna start the party? Oh, oh yeah. Okay. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Let, let's start the party. Yeah. Anyway, I think I turned on karaoke on the girl strip. Oh, I love that. Made it happen. Yes. So anyway, I'm a fun mom. You are a fun mom, apparently in weird ways, so that's my purpose. Very good. Being a fun mom. Yes. Okay, so you guys, thank you for listening today. Yes. If you enjoyed today and you learned something new or you would consider leaving a review or sharing the podcast with a friend or with your small group, we would be so thankful to have more people listening and using whatever is helpful from the podcast. So. Room member friends, you have a seat at our table every time and any time. We hope you have the best week and we'll see you next time at my Tennessee table.